Girls Fight Back Blog! http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog The Official Blog of Girls Fight Back! Mon, 22 Aug 2011 16:02:10 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 Another reason to love teachers http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/08/another-reason-to-love-teachers/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/08/another-reason-to-love-teachers/#comments Mon, 22 Aug 2011 16:02:10 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=904



Today I was dropping off my son at his daycare, which is also a school. I was approached by the school owner, who asked if I would deliver a Girls Fight Back presentation to his staff in September. Without even knowing my schedule, I said yes – which I never do without checking with our Program Director first. But in that moment, I knew I was being asked to give the most important and most valuable opportunity in the world. More critical than any engagement addressing the UN, or an ivy league commencement…and here’s why.

If you really needed another reason to love teachers, it’s because they have a unique opportunity to predict and prevent violence in schools. In cases like Coach Dave Sanders as a dramatic example, (Dave was the only teacher who died in the Columbine shootings in April 1999) they are willing to go to tremendous extremes for the sake of our nation’s kids. Far before events like Columbine occur, teachers may see clues that something is amiss. They interact with parents, with students and with other staff. They are observers of the environment of which our children learn in. They are the keepers of the place where our kids spend many of their days, and therefore have the opportunity to listen to some incredibly powerful intuitive messages that maybe, just maybe, something’s not right.

Then they have the opportunity to act. Maybe it’s to confront someone or simply speak up and tell a superior who can intervene. This is the new heroism, and I believe our teachers are up for the challenge.

While not every parent can offer teaching a self-defense workshop like I can, there is something else you can do. Consider buying your child’s teacher – or even better, the entire staff of the school – a copy of Gavin de Becker’s book: Protecting the Gift: Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe.

We can’t save everyone from violence, not even our own children – as painful and unbearable as that thought may be. But you are not powerless! All of us can provide people the tools that just might help them save themselves….or someone else…from violence someday. Gavin’s book is a great example of that.

Here’s wishing you and your children a fun-filled year of learning and growing in a most peaceful setting.

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/08/another-reason-to-love-teachers/feed/ 0 A badass response to street harassment http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/a-badass-response-to-street-harassment/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/a-badass-response-to-street-harassment/#comments Thu, 30 Jun 2011 13:36:09 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=874



Emily May is the founder and Executive Director of Hollaback, a non-profit organization dedicated to ending street harassment around the world.

Hollaback! was founded because we were pissed off about our inability to fight back against street harassment.  When we walked on we felt weak, when we yelled at guys the situation escalated, and the police didn’t care.

We were haunted by the idea that this was the price we had to pay for living in a city, or being a girl, and we were tired of pretending that it didn’t hurt.  So we started Hollaback.

And after six months of snapping photos and blogging about our experiences, the funniest thing happened: we stopped getting harassed as much.  At first we thought it was a fluke. But then it just kept happening: holla’ing back resulted in less harassment.

How does this happen?  For me, it was psychological. Once I knew I had a badass response to street harassment, it didn’t scare me anymore. Whereas I used to walk down the street thinking, “please don’t say anything please don’t say anything” on repeat in my head, Hollaback changed my tune.  Instead of coming from a position of fear I started to walk down the street with my cell phone camera in hand thinking, “just try me.”  It was a framework shifting.

I’m not saying I don’t still get harassed, I do.  But knowing that you can fight back, and that’s it’s not your fault, is an awesome thing.  And this is what Girls Fight Back is all about.  It teaches us that we have a response.  That we don’t just have to be silent. That we can fight back.

On behalf of all of us at Hollaback!, I want to wish a very happy 10th birthday to Erin Weed and the Girls Fight Back team.  Here’s to another 10 years of kicking butt, and reminding all of us that we can too.

Note from Erin: How I love me some Emily May! We recently enjoyed dinner and wine at the cutest French cafe in New York City, and talked for hours about a world where women felt safe enough to walk down the street. To support Hollaback!, check out their new “I’ve got your back” campaign that is designed to engage bystanders in the fight against street harassment.  And if you’re able, please donate!

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/a-badass-response-to-street-harassment/feed/ 0 Happy birthday from our finance guru http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/happy-birthday-from-our-finance-guru/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/happy-birthday-from-our-finance-guru/#comments Thu, 30 Jun 2011 02:46:21 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=882



Greg Ellis is the finance guru at GFB, Partner at Ellis BLB and father to 2 badass kids!

Working with the GFB team has been a great experience.  Erin has put together a great network and team to help get spread the GFB message.  I can only imagine the number of people GFB has touched in the last ten years.

Erin is the most energetic and driven person I’ve ever worked with and seems to pull off anything she puts her mind to.  Her energy and passion spread throughout the company making it so much fun to work with.

Happy Birthday GFB and thanks for letting me be a part of it!

Note from Erin: For anyone (like me) that attempted to learn Quickbooks more than 6 times in your lifetime thus far, QUIT DREAMING! Hire a stellar finance guru and do the work you actually enjoy and are good at. Seriously, asking Greg to join our team was one of the best decisions I’ve made and I’m grateful he’s made working with GFB so easy for our clients, agencies and staff. Thanks for everything Greg!

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/happy-birthday-from-our-finance-guru/feed/ 0 Fired up for a safer world http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/fired-up/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/fired-up/#comments Wed, 29 Jun 2011 19:37:16 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=863



Robert Martin is Vice President of Gavin de Becker & Associates, and is widely regarded as one of the Nation’s leading experts in assessing and managing violently inclined situations.

Happy Birthday Girls Fight Back.  I remember when you were a new-born, only ten years ago.  My, how you have grown – and grown – touching many lives along the way.

In December of 2001, I sent an email to a friend in New Jersey who was looking for top notch safety programs, and my comments included the following:

“…and there is a young woman in Hoboken who teaches what is shaping up to be a very successful women’s self-defense program.  Her name is Erin Weed and she founded a program called Girls Fight Back at www.GirlsFightBack.com.”

“Success” is not always an easy term to define, but presenting to over one million people in ten years has to be on the list somewhere.

A week later, in December of 2001, Erin’s response to a pending conference call spoke volumes about her, she said: “Since I’m relatively new to the game, I’ll probably need someone to take me up to speed…but as Bob can assure you, I’m FIRED up about combating crime, assault, etc….”

And I am FIRED up about watching where the next ten years takes you.

Note from Erin: How in the world did I get someone as amazing and experienced as Bob Martin to drink our GFB kool-aid? Seriously, read his bio and you’ll understand my amazement. Bob has been my friend, advisor, expert and coach, since day one…and somewhere along the line, he also became family. Thanks for being one of our and biggest fans for the longest time…

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/fired-up/feed/ 0 The greatest oak was once a little nut… http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/the-greatest-oak-was-once-a-little-nut/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/the-greatest-oak-was-once-a-little-nut/#comments Mon, 27 Jun 2011 16:43:19 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=816



Lee Paiva-Sinclair is based in San Francisco with 3 teenagers, a husband, dogs– in love with all. She is Founder of NO MEANS NO Worldwide, a global rape prevention program, and established the first organized women’s self-defense program in Kenya.

I first met Erin at a summer self defense conference where we were both speakers. I was actually quite new to the self defense world and had a lot to learn. Erin and I hit it off right from the start – even to the point where the next morning we came out from our respective dorm rooms with the exact same hairdo!

Through Erin and Girls Fight Back I found a whole world of light and positivity being directed at two of the darkest issues we could ever face – rape and murder. Erin found a way to shift that horror into a prism of empowerment and even humor. From where I stand, this is no small feat. Girls Fight Back is a breath of fresh air in what is typically the least popular topic on the planet. I secretly believe she is some kind of superwoman for getting girls to engage on this subject and feel cool for doing so.

Check this GFB list and judge for yourself if something supernatural is taking place:

  • GFB rose from the ashes of a horrific tragedy
  • Founded and run by a woman
  • Delivers impactful rape prevention presentations like a female Chris Rock
  • Uses bright, youthful, blackness-busting colors to re-brand the self defense movement
  • Networks with like minded people and orgs like Zuckerberg on steroids
  • Flies to colleges and businesses all over the country – with a baby sometimes – to deliver the good news about personal safety
  • Constantly gives generously of GFB time,  resources and expertise for FREE
  • Wrote an amazing book for college bound girls (the BEST gift you can give a graduating senior)
  • Trail blazes the use of social networking to keep women and girls connected and active in the cause
  • Creates a healthy non egoic work environment that improves and empowers her staff, not just the message
  • Is not pushing a proprietary information lock down. Her safety strategies, business, marketing, promotion and media expertise are shared fearlessly. ‘If it’s useful to you and your cause – have at it.’ (Those are her exact words.)
  • Calls me up and says “I was thinking about what you said and I had an idea ….” and it’s mind blowingly brilliant every time.

Girls Fight Back is a living, breathing expression of what it means to practice with purity of purpose. This is not a flowery note tacked to the end of my letter, this is my true and honest experience of Erin and the program she has created.  So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GFB! Ten years is a long time in any business and the sky is apparently the limit for you. I leave with a quote that reminds me so much of the testament and temperament of Erin and the GFB dynamic:

“The greatest oak was once a little nut who held its ground.”

Glad we get we all get to be a little nuts together!

Note from Erin: On the day I met Lee, we sat under a tree for about 5 hours talking. It was like a time machine, that tree. Since then, Lee has become more like a sister, and she is the first person that challenged me to take GFB global. That happened, and I’m forever grateful to her for pushing the limits that only our minds seem to put on what’s possible…

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/the-greatest-oak-was-once-a-little-nut/feed/ 0 10 Years of oohs and ahhs… http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/10-years-of-oohsahhs/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/10-years-of-oohsahhs/#comments Fri, 24 Jun 2011 15:30:30 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=843



Liz Meitus is a creative thinker, Marketing Manager at myFORCE and inspired to spread the word about this personal security service that you active through your smartphone.

10 years of butt-kickin’ events already??!! Well, we’re looking forward to the next 10! Thank you for your passion, your mission, and your dedication to spreading the message of safety.

You are infectious, animated, yet poignant. As one of your fall sponsors, we saw first-hand the impact that young women felt upon leaving a GFB event. Not only were young women empowered to take a stance in the face of crime, they felt amused enough to be vocal about it. I’ve never heard so many oohs-and-ahhs from an audience that’s known for a short attention span these days.

Happy Birthday Girls Fight Back!

Note from Erin: I am a big believer in partnerships…but good ones that are win-win situations, where everyone walks away happy and inspired. That describes our relationship with every partner we’ve ever had, including Liz and the folks at myFORCE. Looking forward to our collective future!

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/10-years-of-oohsahhs/feed/ 0 Happy Birthday from Heather Maggs http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/happy-birthday-from-heather-maggs/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/happy-birthday-from-heather-maggs/#comments Thu, 23 Jun 2011 20:43:40 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=832



Heather Maggs is a Girls Fight Back speaker, and has been since 2009. She is based in North Carolina and is an actress while not presenting for GFB.


Note from Erin: Heather has been a total rock star this year, doing a good majority of GFB programs from coast to coast. Whoever says Southern girls can’t kick ass clearly never met Heather Maggs. Thanks for being such a loyal part of our team Heather, and I look forward to all you accomplish this Fall and beyond!

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/happy-birthday-from-heather-maggs/feed/ 0 Yoga saved my life http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/yoga-saved-my-life/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/yoga-saved-my-life/#comments Wed, 22 Jun 2011 13:58:13 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=819



Lauren Jonik is a Brooklyn-based freelance writer and photographer. She is currently at work on a memoir. Her landscape, cityscape and nature photography can be viewed on www.shootlikeagirlphotography.com.

“There’s someone I think you should be in touch with,” my friend Dina said after she had heard the news. Just days before on a steamy July afternoon in Brooklyn, all of my preconceived notions about when and where—and to whom—violent crimes occur were shattered. “Her name is Erin Weed and she runs an organization called Girls Fight Back,” Dina continued. My mind and body were still in a confusing state of disarray.
While cat-sitting for a friend, I entered her apartment building and got on a small elevator with a stranger in a bright red t-shirt. On that day, I simply planned to go to my friend’s Brooklyn apartment. He, on the other hand, demonstrated that he planned to rape and kill someone. But, the day did not go as expected for either of us.

As the elevator doors closed, he immediately pushed behind me, grabbing my neck with his thick, meaty arm. I tried to free myself, to jam my keys into his flesh, but he had every counter-move choreographed. After both of us fell to the floor, I tried to poke him in the eyes, I frantically tried to grab at his ears, but my attempts fell short each time. At last, I was able to get in to a position where I could kick him in the face. As the bottom of my sneaker connected with his nose, I was grateful for all of the hours I had spent in yoga classes gaining strength, flexibility and peace of mind. It was, in addition to the pure grace of God, my yoga training that helped to save me.

But, being in kicked in the face didn’t go over too well with The Monster and so he stood partly up and began to unbutton his pants with one hand while holding my throat with the other. I flailed wildly with all of the fading strength I could. His frustration increased, as did my determination. He then punched my face repeatedly as the elevator ascended to yet another floor—with no one on the other side of the doors. My pulse raced as thoughts flooded my mind, each bringing with it another dose of adrenaline. At last, with seconds to spare, I flailed my arm one last time and hit the buzzer on the side panel of the elevator. The noise startled him, the doors opened yet again and he ran out. I crawled into the hallway and gasped for help. The attack was over and my new life post-attack had just begun.

Connecting with Erin in those first fragile weeks was a pivotal element in initiating the healing process. I learned that I was far from alone in my experience and it was validating to be reminded that I had done all I could. Violent crimes can happen to anyone at any time—even in the middle of an afternoon in an affluent location. And, it wasn’t a weapon or physical strength that allowed me to save my life, but staying present in the moment—even a horrible one—to make it through to the other side.
Many thanks and happy 10th birthday, GFB!
Note from Erin: I met Lauren for the first time in person when I opened New Jersey’s only women’s self-defense studio back in 2006, and threw a ragin’ party at the space. If you own a copy of my book, I write about Lauren’s story in the epilogue. It was such a catharsis for me, to finish the book with her amazing story after spending so many years researching the most horrific endings to violence.  So rarely do we hear these success stories! Lauren’s story makes a case for having more inner peace as a self-defense technique. Calm down and breathe – it could save your life someday. Big thanks to Lauren for going down a not-so-pleasant memory lane to recollect this story for our e-party…I truly appreciate your ongoing bravery.
]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/yoga-saved-my-life/feed/ 0 An Unassuming Beauty http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/an-unassuming-beauty/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/an-unassuming-beauty/#comments Tue, 21 Jun 2011 15:55:37 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=805



Today would have been Shannon Elizabeth McNamara’s birthday. The poem below was written by a dear friend of the McNamara family, Sharon Rickerson. Sharon also has written a unique poem the previous 9 years that Shannon has been gone. If you live in the Chicago area, check out the Daily Herald tomorrow, as this poem will be published there.

She lives

In Heaven

Not far but Away

Her spirit Near and dear

For Now we wait

FOrever will come

And there will be No more tears

‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”  Revelation 21:4

Encouraging to all who knew her

Lovely inside and out

Inspiring to young and old

Zealous, vibrant and joyful

Athletic, fair and gracious

Brave and strong

Engaging her world

True to her Maker, true to all

His child and our delight

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139:13,14

Happy Birthday Shan; we miss you so much!

Note from Erin: June is a rough month for all who loved Shannon, with her death happening on June 12 and her birthday on June 21. I feel her birthday is so symbolic however, since today is the summer solstice. This is the first day of summer, and the day of the year with the longest period of daylight. Isn’t that symbolic of how much light Shannon has shed upon this world in her short life?

]]> http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/an-unassuming-beauty/feed/ 4 Birthday wishes from Tony Blauer http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/birthday-wishes-from-tony-blauer/ http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/2011/06/birthday-wishes-from-tony-blauer/#comments Mon, 20 Jun 2011 21:16:48 +0000 Erin Weed http://www.girlsfightback.com/blog/?p=789



Tony Blauer is personal defense & combatives consultant who travels internationally sharing his research with conscientious self-defense experts & military & law enforcement training units. He is CEO & Founder of S.P.E.A.R. SYSTEM & HIGH GEAR. Visit his website at http://www.tonyblauer.com

I’m pretty sure I’ve known Erin for almost as long she’s been on her mission.

Born out of a tragedy that could’ve easily had the reverse effect on anyone, Erin had the insight, integrity and courage to look deeply at what happened to her close friend Shannon McNamara and turn that event into a powerful message that continues to inspire countless people the world-over.  Erin’s vision and passion is the Girls Fight Back legacy.

I’m continually amazed by the growth of the program and look forward to writing another anniversary message for Girls Fight Back in 2021. To Erin and her team, happy birthday, you girls kick butt.

Note from Erin: Thanks for the well-wishes Tony. Means a lot coming from such a bad-ass like you! Thanks for being a friend, a confidant and a mentor in this wild industry. I look forward to cookin’ up some big things together, so you can write about them in your 20th happy birthday post in 2021…

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